Adult bullying: The epidemic no one talks about | Kevin Ward | TEDxSantaBarbara

I grew up to believe that if I am nice to people they are nice to me. Unfortunately I learned that life doesn't work like that.

I was fired for standing up to a bully. This is precisely what is wrong with our society.

Notice how if you fight back at school, you get in more trouble than the bully. No wonder our young people are so screwed up.

"Bullies don't fight fair. Why should you?"

I was always taught to 'just ignore it', or in other words 'just let it happen and don't react'. The worst lesson I was ever taught as a child and decades later I'm still unlearning it.

This is why kids shouldn't get in trouble for punching a bully in the face. It's necessary.

Bullying is personal because bullies know exactly who to pick on and who not to

After years of being diplomatic, I realised it didn't work. I now fight back. No mercy.

Ever notice that all those people who claim they're against bullying keep focusing on how the victim reacts but never once blame the bullies for their initial decision to bully them in the first place?

I was bullied horribly in school and in jobs until I went to art school and met some very cool student friends who'd also been bullied. It was then that I realized that we'd been bullied because we wanted to be authentic people and not just followers of the crowd.

Bullies are cowards and back down when confronted.

Truth. The internalization of bullying can ruin you for decades.

Unfortunately there is no standing up to someone who has a mental or personality disorder. They bulldoze right over any boundaries you set. Sometimes you just have cut those toxic people out of your life.

Teacher bullying as a young child almost led me to suicide. "Teachers don't bully" is what I was always told. My parents didn't believe me.

We live in a sick society. Periodt.

You can also expose the bully in front of everyone that this person (call his name out) is bullying you. Bully thrive on victims who are silent.

Bulling is serious, and comes in many forms. It's all about power and control!

Parents and siblings bully too... it starts from day one and doesn’t stop when you hit adulthood. It only stops when you wise up and stand up. Even then sometimes you still have to walk away. We need to talk about this more, thank you for the talk.

I like knowing I don't need acceptance from anyone but myself.

I’ve been bullied my entire life; from family, friends, co-workers and neighbors. I’ve had personal strength and confidence my whole life, but that doesn’t make me less affected. I have C/PTSD from it all and this abuse is steeped in narcissism. It’s all called narcissistic abuse and it claims lives, rips families apart, and ruins great jobs and teams. I’ve seen one bad apple ruin the bunch my entire life. This is a pandemic issue and everyone needs to read and learn about narcissistic abuse and the spectrum of narcissism to protect themselves. Victims need to tell their stories and throw these people under the bus. I’m not going to be abused and then be quiet about it. I’m glad you decided to tell. That’s the first line of defense.