Mitch Hedberg: Waffles Are Like Pancakes With Syrup Traps | Late Night With Conan O'Brien
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Published 2021-07-30
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All Comments (21)
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My favorite Mitch one liner: "A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer"
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Mitch was an absolute genius at one liners. Most comedians work through telling stories or building off topics. This dude just straight up told JOKES.
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"You can't please all the people all the time, and last night all those people were at my show." ~ Mitch
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“I haven’t slept for 10 days, because that would be too long.”
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"I hate arrows man, don't you?" I love the one guy clapping very loudly at the setup, presumably having finally found validation for his lifelong hatred of all things pointy and directional.
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"I give you the money, you give me the doughnut. We don't have to bring paper and ink into this."
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Rest of the golf joke: "I hit a guy once. I didn't yell, 'fore', cuz I was too busy mumbling, 'there ain't no way it's gonna hit him'".
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“Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy... all day. “ - Thank you Mitch for all the laughs!!! 💛🙏🏼💛 For ever a legend!!
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The soup of the day joke is so abrupt that people aren't ready for it. Too good.
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Rice is great for when you're hungry and you want two thousand of something.
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I had a crippling addiction to opiates and benzos for about 15 years of my life. I lived in deep regret for about the first 4 years of my recovery, but I’ve turned my regret into empathy for those who are suffering and those who paid the ultimate price as the result of addiction. Mitch Hedburg, Layne Staley, Kurt Cobain, Chris Farley, and many other endlessly talented people brought us immeasurable joy through one of the hardest tribulations a person can endure, and I’ll always remember them for it.
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Mitch's humor is very similar to Steven Wright's, but the delivery is what sets him apart. Wright is like listening to a crazy guy in an asylum who's had all day every day to just think about stuff, while Mitch is like an innocent little kid with ADD just delivering observations as fast as he makes them.
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Mitch lives on through his art. His comedy is some of the most repeated stuff on the internet. Gone but not forgotten
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I love how innocent and happy he looks, just reeling off the jokes so easily.
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One of my favorite jokes he did was in That 70’s show when he says to Kelso “I did not lose my leg in Vietnam to serve kids French fries” Kelso “ But you have both legs?” Mitch “Like I said I did not lose my leg in Vietnam!”
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"I wanna hang a map of the world in my house, and then im gonna put pins in all the places i have traveled to. but first ima have to travel to the top two corners of the map...so it wont fall down." Shit like this is fucking genius. RIP Mitch!
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I was lucky enough to see him live. I couldn't breathe he was so funny. It was fall/early winter 2003 so right around this time. He opened for Dave Atell and Lewis Black.
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No matter how great you are at tennis, you'd never beat a wall.
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I think Mitch was the last of the truly original stand-up comics. His nervous appearance, observational style and halting delivery are a perfect match and that makes his material all the more hilarious.
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The joke about just simply being thirsty to enjoy drinking Gatorade is so enjoyable.
