THESE are the signs you have a mother wound

First sign: you clicked on this video

I'm now almost 62 and never felt safe, wanted, or loved by my mother. I haven't seen my mom now since 1995. I never had my own children because I was taught that children weren't important and didn't have any rights or value. I struggle to be around people, but I'm good with animals.

My mother went to prison when I was a few months old. I was raised by grandparents for a good chunk of early years who were both alcoholics. I broke the cycle of addiction by getting clean in 2016,

I remember since I was very young, feeling like my mom didn't like me. Whatever I did, I was never good enough for her. I tried really hard for years until I just gave up, it just wasn't worth the energy to try and make her happy. She also had an obvious preference for my brother, he was a bully... Whatever he did, she was always on his side, blaming me for it. As an adult, I tried to talk to her about it, even my dad admitted they did things wrong, which is okay because they tried. But she just accused me of making things up and being ridiculous, answering me with sarcasm. Her usual answer if I ever ask for help is to "get over it." She's a great person to everyone else, caring and understanding, just not with me.

Coldness and rejection made me a lone wolf...I gave up trying to find alike people.

I'm a complete lone wolf. I dont like to rely on anybody for anything but the funny thing is, as soon as somebody else needs help, I'm more than willing to help them. I battle with low self esteem and self worth.

Definitely, have suffered from the mother wound! I also passed it to my daughter being a single mom when she was younger working and being in survival mode the only difference is I work hard now to be present for my daughter and granddaughter. I have a close relationship with them. A genuine, loving bond, thank God for correction.

I'm 68 and was taken away from my mother at 5 years old. My step mother hated me and my foster mother never let me forget that I didn't belong. I was not allowed to have any feelings. I had to look 'happy'. I feel no connection to family and it set me up for bad relationships. Whatever happens I 'look happy' while inside I'm screaming 😢

I never share. Or comment or post, But I think that is part of my mother wound. If I took up too much space use my voice had an opinion or had an emotion I was a problem. So I learned to go into a little turtle shell. Unfortunately I’ve struggled to reach out for support when I need it as an adult.

Distance is the right word, there never is real intimacy, they say they love you but there is always that Distance that tells you the love is not real, it is not unconditional....I am lucky to have married a man who is secure and loving, there is no distance emotionally I know he loves me, he does not need to say the words...I feel badly for my mom who will never know what true love feels like but so proud of myself for breaking the cycle...😊

My mother shut down emotionally when she lost her parents at a young age. She was critical of EVERYTHING and EVERYONE! Her only demonstrable emotion was anger. Not raging or anything. She loved a good argument because she felt it kept her defiance alive and growing. She hid it from herself by calling it being independent. From day one i felt the need to parent her and did throughout my life. As an old woman, i was looking forward to her passing so i could be free. It’s been a rough road, this freedom, because i didn’t think I’d have relearn how to create a life for myself.

Sad how many people, myself included, are going to tick all boxes

My mom had a miscarriage before me and always told me “you’re lucky you are here. If I had the other baby, you wouldn’t be here.” It was not in a tone that made me feel loved and cherished. I was told children should be seen and not heard. I was told not to cry. When bottled up emotions erupted as anger, she laughed and said I was overreacting. She always criticized that I was a perfectionist believing I was born that way. My mom may have told me she loves me (I don’t remember if she did) but I feel energy and I could tell it wasn’t genuine. I could go on and on……. I fought with everything within me NOT to become my mom. Thankfully my relationship with my kids is a beautiful gift. When I’m called out on bad behavior, I take responsibility for my actions, heal and transform.

I am aware of my mother wounds. As a mother myself now, I’m working on healing and being a better mom for my child 🙏❤️✨

I realized today that my mother will never change, so our relationship will never change. After crying for hours, I came to your channel. Thank you. Just thank you.

Total lone wolf here , never felt safe, seen, heard or understood growing up, its a damn curse because its ingrained and enforced over decades. Slow process to unlearn and build trust in people.

I'm 58 - no kids, no husband, no boyfriends ever, emotional/romantic/intimacy anorexic. I disassociated from my body & needs bc hers always come first. She always tried to hide/isolate me from the world (even resented time spent w/my brother.) A lifetime of invalidation, trying to break my self-esteem, infantalize me, shame me< I am a fearful avoidant attachment style/cptsd/codependent, enmeshed w/her. Bc of emotional hunger, I fed my face instead of my body w/real intimacy & partnership and lived in magical thinking and with limerence. THANK YOU AGAIN DR. LEPERA!!

Maybe the last two? She was working, sleeping, or reading romance novels. Our job was to leave her the hell alone. She hated me, especially. I was “weird.” Then she chose my abuser over me and that necessitated an end to whatever relationship we had.

I received the punishment for "all men" from toddler age onward. Physical abuse, emotional abuse, neglect, silent treatment, whatever my mom needed to self soothe. There was always an implied condition of verbal abuse with every meal, clothing item, and gesture. Self-reliance wasn't just safety, it became existential salvation.

Breaking the cycle. 50 this year and I wish I would've recognised earlier the mother wound passed on through our generations. After digging the past I see where my mom got it from as well. I used to blame her inability to create a close, affectionate relationship with me, but then in my late 30's I learned about the abuse she went through since very young. Now I feel compassion for her. We don't speak because of religious believes that she shares, so I am thiking to write her a letter. A letter of acknowledgement of her struggles... of forgiveness. Maybe this way she can also find healing.