Why I'm a vegan CHEF after losing everything

One day I was speaking with a woman who lost her son to brain cancer. I asked her, what is something I can say to someone who is going through grief instead of saying “sorry for your loss” and she said “ I want people to ask what he was like, People always thing I don’t want to talk about him but I love talking about him” Now, each time I ask someone “What was their name and what kinds of things were they interested in?” It’s been amazing. People light up and share about their loved ones. “ He loved to fish” “She loved to grow giant pumpkin’s!” Maybe more of us can try this.

Please do not underestimate the compassionate energy you bring to the world. Your connection to Amanda's spirit is beautiful and vibrant.

I started my disappearing act when I was nine, after my mother died from cancer. After I didn’t see her family anymore and my father shut down. No more holidays. No more birthdays. No more warmth. The only thing that made me feel less empty was playing piano and then cooking. No one ever cooked for me after my mother died, but I found some of her recipes and I made them as best I could with what was around. When I had kids, I made everything for them from scratch. I’ve known so little love in my life but I was able to manifest it out of nowhere to make sure my kids were loved. I still feel invisible, but I want to put good things out into the world so that others don’t feel like I do. ❤ thank you for your videos. My household has been vegan for a long long time. I could never hurt an animal or wish violence upon them for my food

You’re changing the world one person at a time by speaking about this. I just quit a 30 year career in Tech to become a certified End of Life Doula to help normalize death, and embrace talking about loss openly. No one should have to be alone in their grief because the people in their lives don’t know how to support them (no judgement - it’s endemic in our society). You are a beautiful soul, Derek. Thank you for this video. It’s my favorite to date. ❤

Nothing needs to suffer or die for me to lead a happy successful life.....a great sentiment.

I am so grateful for you making this video! As a doctor who works in oncology I often have to deal with people loosing their loved ones. Sadly our culture has los many of the rituals and wisdom of dealing with death. Many people think they just have to get on with life and lose themselves in the process. You are such a strong person, dealing with the loss of Amanda and turning towards love and compassion instead of cynicism and bitterness. Please know that you are one truly precious human being who teaches so many of us how to show compassion!!

Fellow vegan here, 15 years. I just discovered you a few weeks back. Love your channel! I lost the love of my life four years ago July 23rd. I’m no stranger to grief, but it still really sucks! Sadly it is just part of this life we live. It gets better only if we face it, move through it in time as you e been doing. They are with us always. 🩷 Thank you for sharing your story. ❤

When I received the alert that you had posted this video, I was sitting in the dark and crying after having received my final divorce papers. My heart immediately went to you and your struggle. The strength you developed on your journey is inspiring. Thank you for the perspective. 💚

Brother, I can tell your Frankie is a savior to you. She is a gift from above.

An Irish prayer that helps me when I am missing those I love on the other side "Death is nothing at all I have only slipped away to the next room- I am I, and you are you. Whatever we were to each other, That, we still are" I believe with all my being they are still with us. Guiding. Watching. Protecting.

Amanda made a big difference in your life, while she lived and when she passed. What a life to honour. Thank you for sharing your life with Amanda, as well as, your experience with dealing with tragic loss. This was lovely, Derek. I’m so glad you have Frankie…she is a little love bug.❤❤❤

"Nobody asked me how I felt about it. " I lost my dad when I was 16, and my mom when I was 32, and this little phrase made me reflect a lot. Plenty of people will ask you how you feel, but nobody asks how you feel specifically about that loss.

Lost my partner 11 years ago in a car accident, also not his fault. I chose to forgive the other driver and I found peace.

Sorry for your loss. Love how you’ve turned grief into compassion for all living things. Thank you for sharing how Amanda lives on through your work.

Nearly four years ago, my husband and I lost our 24-year-old daughter to her self-negating mental illness. By telling your story of loss and grief you've provided help with healing for many, including me. My husband doesn't talk much about losing our girl, but I talk all the time. He digs into the dirt and has created beautiful gardens around our home. Reminds me of you preparing food. I strongly believe that, in healing, we may discover who we were meant to be. I am counting on that and I firmly believe that the love we have for our lost ones grows and grows over time. It is a blessing. The love just IS. Thank you.

I can't imagine how difficult it must've been to make this video. The fact you decided to share this with your audience exemplifies your compassion and desire to help others, whether it be through delicious, non-harmful recipes, or sharing life experiences. Thank you Derek! ☮️

I lost my husband 2 years ago. So very hard. I am learning how to move forward WITH him instead of moving on. He is always a part of me.

This was one of the most beautiful videos I have ever seen. It honors you and your loved one. Thank you for sharing.

This is a beautiful tribute to Amanda.

I lost my husband of almost 30 years 1 month ago. He was in pain, but manageable. He was slowing down considerably in his last month. Sleeping a lot. I am plant based and he was pretty much so. His appetite was good even up to the night before he passed. I miss him terribly. As the all the fuss abates from this, (going to the bank, getting all the paperwork done, figuring out the computer)… I find the evenings so quiet. People really don’t know what to say, and I get that. I will find my way. I found your video comforting as I love cooking and make food for not just myself, but I tend to give some to friends (who love my cooking, bless their hearts, as I always make too much)… He was 84. I’m 72. There are pockets of deep sadness, but nothing is permanent, so I know this will pass. Thank you for sharing your story. And your incredible talent for cooking. 🇨🇦