self-estrangement: becoming a stranger to yourself

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Learning to admit that admit to being wrong without feeling that I "lost" some sort of debate is one of the most freeing experiences in discourse, and learning to adjust your views based on new information is an important step toward personal growth.

I never once considered the fact that the main character of The Stranger was autistic, even though I've read The Stranger numerous times as well as having a BA in Psychology. Makes perfect sense in retrospect. It's wild how you can learn things that you should already know, and that seem obvious once you know them. 🤔

People are strange when you're a stranger Faces look ugly when you're alone Women seem wicked when you're unwanted Streets are uneven when you're down When you're strange faces come out of the rain When you're strange no one remembers your name

I met a person almost exactly like that protagonist from The Stranger. They seemed callous, and ended up offending more sensitive people, but upon getting to know the person, there was no malicious intent. Fascinating person, great for philosophical conversations.

in my experience with mental health treatment, I have to be self estranged constantly to get any help. I have to view myself in this third person lens, as if I'm in a constant patient/doctor analysis. there's a fine line to this too, if you know too much, you're seen as faking. if you say too little, you're not seen as worth helping. there are no rulebooks for this either, and every professional is different. it's resulted in me not knowing how to experience my life and emotions in the moment.

We need more people like you on the internet

Kierkegaard has another great quote that I think runs parallel to the idea of self-estrangement. “When I was young, I forgot how to laugh in the cave of Trophonius; when I was older, I opened my eyes and beheld reality, at which I began to laugh, and since then, I have not stopped laughing. I saw that the meaning of life was to secure a livelihood, and that its goal was to attain a high position; that love’s rich dream was marriage with an heiress; that friendship’s blessing was help in financial difficulties; that wisdom was what the majority assumed it to be; that enthusiasm consisted in making a speech; that it was courage to risk the loss of ten dollars; that kindness consisted in saying, “You are welcome,” at the dinner table; that piety consisted in going to communion once a year. This I saw, and I laughed.”

good stuff here olivia. it's really important to talk about history in a way that does not encourage a tacit acceptance for some type of social "truth" that we must accept about inferiority and superiority of certain people, and always important to question where mainstream historical narratives have decided a story "ends"

I'm still not sure I understand the concept of self-strangement, but I think I went through something similar during the lockdown years. I always had very strong beliefs, moral compass, and overall opinions. During lockdown, I found myself alone in a bedroom, staring at a wall for days on end, and that somehow made me reflect incessantly about who I was, why I was like that, and why I thought about my own opinions in such high regard. I realized that I am no more than anyone else, no matter how much I see myself as more righteous, more logical, more emphatetic. All these notions were fogging my view of other people's perspectives, understandings, life-long beliefs and morals. I might think I am more "moral", more "progressive" and, to an extent, more just and fair. But where does that lead me? I isolated myself from the real world, protected and alienated inside a bubble, where me and my inner circle lived as if we were right, all of those outside were wrong. I slowly left that bubble, even if I might have entered another one unknowingly, but I feel better. I realized that if I put myself as so morally superior, because I'm a leftist, because I am progressive, I'm simply going to lose connections with a whole world of people. I realized, that in real life, work life, everyday life, if I continued down that path I would live in loneliness. I am free to debate, to consider, to try and convince, but I am not, or at least should not be free to belittle, humilate and diminish those I disagree with. Needless to say, when I made those self reflections, I lost most of the friends I made in that bubble, but I realized I was limiting myself, my experience and understanding of life, on the notion that I had to be morally superior - which in and of itself is not morally correct at all, in my opinion. I realized I was not going to be in my early 20s forever, and that to survive (and be happy) in society, I needed to open my mind, to learn how to convey my opinions without offending other's intelligence. I am much happier, even if I abide or acknowledge social norms that I do not care or agree with. It is a fair price for my own peace of mind.

I often have these moments (well recently not as much anymore) where I feel the absurdity of human society and this world in of itself and am just awestruck or pummeled by the weirdness of something seemingly normal. Im actually kind of fond of these moments, because they give me another angle on a certain topic, wich can be anything. I see myself as pretty selfreflected and so I often... well pretty much everytime like to take a step back and judge my own actions, be it in art or just my day to day life in general. Im really hard on myself, but it helps me also be happy with what I do and be proud of who I am and who I became (well sometimes).

I get an existential crisis from almost every video you make, but I still enjoy everything you say. You're a wonderful creator. Thank you @oliSUNvia

Self-estrangement is actually something natural to me, due to my neurodivergence. It makes me very good at self-reflection though, as if I could put my own mind in front of a mirror. I guess that's also one of the reasons I'm so interested in postmodernism and works of fiction that use metalanguage. Seeing your very everyday reality as something "other" really helps you putting things in perspective.

This video straight up directly covers so many things I have grappled with over a very difficult few years of life and growth from nihilism, fostering a more natural self identity as a neurodivergent person, and being a history major a tad obsessed with the role of culture and 'history' in forming oneself, that I will come across as a rambling maniac if I tried to write it all in a comment.. Basically this scratched an existential itch, so thank you!

I don't know how I am this early, but I really enjoyed reading the stranger a while ago, so I'm excited

this video made me realize something that i will definitely be incorporating into my thesis! im writing about gender, fractals, and multiplicity of the self. im drawing a lot from Maria Lugones and Mariana Ortega. i feel like this idea of self estrangement is very much tied to the experience of being in between world and world traveling. when you travel from one world to another and contradictions come up (like Lugones’ famous example of being playful in her Latina community and unplayful or serious in her professional world) this causes self estrangement. but the problem doesn’t fall on the self to be consistent, i think it’s more about recognizing how different worlds have different expectations placed on the self and our comfortability acting one way or another in said context. both “contradictory” selves are still authentic selves imo, because the self is multiplicitous. i’ll stop here cuz i can’t explain all my ideas in a youtube comment, but i love your videos!!!❤️

I think immersing yourself in a different culture (like actually living there for a while) is a way of self-estrangement. Hence so many people say that living abroad has changed them so much.

Thrilled to see you discussing Mersault, as I very recently read The Stranger and A Happy Death. He’s unlike any character I’d ever read about or seen, glad to see you diving into it

I wanna see more videos like this all over YouTube. Thanks for providing genuinely insightful, thoughtful videos for my notifications, Olivia - makes me happy to see 🙂

I see Camus, I watch.