What is Emotional Intelligence?

The conversation here has taken a fascinating turn (fascinating for us at least): we see a lot of comments that want to suggest that emotional intelligence does not exist/has been made up/is not a thing. We assume that what people mean by this is that science, especially neuroscience, cannot clearly identify a separate part of the mind that can be referred to as Emotional Intelligence. This is perhaps very true. But it somewhat bypasses our point. We're not looking for scientific validation, we're simply pointing out certain emotional faculties which can be more or less developed in people - and can be fostered by a good surrounding culture. We're surprised too at the line of argument that suggests that the idea of Emotional Intelligence was invented by 'stupid' people to make themselves feel better about not having achieved anything. This seems unnecessarily harsh - because achievement comes in many forms and the ability to understand human nature is as valid a pursuit as the ability to (for example) play basketball or cook well.

I'd like to think my level of emotional intelligence is quite high, and in result of that, I'm rarely ever mad at someone, nor do I hate anyone, because I understand that hurt people usually hurt people. That's not to justify destructive behaviour or bullying, but to understand that these are people who need help, not punishment. I genuinely believe people with this mindset are a lot happier and a lot less resentful than others that thrive off of hate. A friend of mine said studying psychology has completely changed how she reacts to people and their behaviours because of her in depth understanding of the human mind and emotions.

In a nutshell, EI is the ability to understand behaviours of others and controlling own emotions.

I never knew how to put it to words until now. My whole life, I've never been "book smart." I'm rather unintelligent in most areas, and I'm very self conscious about it. Like I could never understand politics, history, and mathematics to the extent that most people around me could. BUT, I've always been very introspective and able to understand and interpret emotions that other people, around me at least, have struggled to grasp. I've been fortunate enough to help a lot of people in my life because of my high "emotional intelligence", or whatever you wanna call it.

I was once called intelligent. That made me emotional.

Emotional intelligence is simply another name for maturity, wisdom, and empathy. It is so important to be able to control and understand your own emotions as well as understanding other's emotions. I don't care what you call it, it's more important than we realise because consciously and subconsciously -- whether we'd like to admit it or not -- we're to a large extent ruled by our emotions and conditioning and recognising and understanding this is the key to living a fulfilling life and having fulfilling relationships with others -- oh, and to prevent us from acting upon these things and doing stupid things.

Emotional intelligence is not the manipulation and supression of emotions, rathermore it's the understanding of one self to know how your emotions work and use it in a constructive way.

Emotional Intelligence is not to be mistaken as having simply to do with emotions and working with emotions. This intelligence is the capacity to integrate our experiences, and to gain thus a more complete picture of life in every moment. It requires awareness, attention, discipline and freedom to respond to the requirements of the present and not simply following the patterns acquired in the past.

I honestly think that emotional intelligence is the ability to handle situations that are intense and emotional. Basically like situations where there's a disagreement between two people, and instead of one of the people trying to start a fight, they decide to work things out verbally.

Emotional Intelligence is the secret key to your dream life

My mother is doing a doctoral at Oxford Brookes Univerisity. I'm proud of her as she is the only one in our family who is doing it.

I feel that I have high emotional intelligence. I lost my dad at 15, and geeze there's a long list of regrets already at that age. I learned to keep the regret list short and not jump to conclusions about angry, sad, or even happy people. We are all together in this life as human beings, so why not work as a team to help those in need.

Unlike IQ which can never be taught and is usually consistent, EI can be taught and improved so this film assures us. Thank you TSOL, you've been an inspiration to us!

Emotional intelligence is subject to widespread denial because our culture idolizes the tough guys, and empathy is seen as weakness. We are so fond of grouping ourselves into "our people" versus "the others" that we can't open ourselves to other people's feelings and cultures, for fear that we would lose our justification for feeling superior to them.

This channel has honestly helped me acquire emotional intelligence. It helped me sympayhise with other people, and have better relationships with people, since I can now interpret the real, hidden meaning behind their actions. I am forever thankful to you, The School of Life, for changing my perception in certain areas in my life, and therefore helping me lead a better, more peaceful life where I am at ease with myself and others.

For me, emotional intelligence is the ability to be relentlessly kind to other people. You don't have to always understand other people in order to be patient and compassionate.

As a therapist myself, my recommendation would be to start by asking these simple questions: Why do they behave the way they do? Say the things they do? Think the way they do? If you spend enough time pondering these questions, something is revealed to you. You realize that most of human behavior is informed by the sum total of our Self so far, that is our experiences, our memories, our personality, our wants and needs, our social life, our career, our environment. The person that we are today is the person we've become. Then take the time to ask yourself what kind of experiences someone might've had to be the person they are, you begin your journey as emotionally intelligent person.

Anyone can become angry, that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way... this is not easy. -Aristotle, the Nicomachean Ethics

I don't understand why people are saying "emotional intelligence doesn't exist". Intelligence means to be highly knowledge in a certain area, but who's to say you can only be intelligent on facts or mathematics. You can easily be more susceptible and sympathetic when it comes to people's feelings and frankly this type of intelligence is underated.

Everyone needs to watch this video. People really fail to even try to understand others, or simply to put themselves in other people's shoes. I try and integrate emotional intelligence into my training I give at work.