DO THIS When Narcissist Talks to You!

Narcissists don’t talk to you they talk at you

The narcissist no longer occupies my space.
It's called divorce.

Don't bother trying to figure out why they abuse you and Manipulate you. Just get the hell out! RUN AND HAVE A LIFE! A NORMAL LIFE!

I would add to this list a few other reasons for a narc’s verbiage: to shame, mock, guilt trip, humiliate, hurt, gaslight, dismiss, spew contempt, deny, contradict, distort, or insult.

Why do Narcs talk?
For 4 weaponized reasons:
1) impress 2) invent a story 3) elevate themselves 4) manipulate

It took me years to realise this on my own. Once I had, it all became very obvious to me, I saw absolutely no purpose in letting her know that I now understood, or point out her true motives, as it always resulted in it being twisted by her to me being 'abusive' and her a victim. I grey rocked, and then told her straight, with no detailed explanation, that this relationship was over. She love bombed for a while but when that had no impact, and elicited no response, she was gone. Vanished.

Omg the stories !!! Never asking questions, only assumptions as truth, correcting everything, even when I express MY emotions he corrects me!! I’m just starting to recover, the last 5 yrs has taken a toll on my health😢

it all makes sense now, I wish I had known this 40 years ago, but, better late than never! Thank you.

THIS IS PURE GOLD! I couldn’t imagine a more succinct explanation of why the narc-psychopath ever speaks. Period! It’s NEVER about the said communication itself, but rather WHY the communication. Every single word is for the purpose of manipulation to benefit their ultimate goal in that moment. And their ongoing goals have no end.
Thank you for putting this out there Prof. Sam Vaknin. This deserves a Nobel Prize 👏👏👏👏

In the depths of the worst of it, I wrote in my journal “Your words seep like poison into my bones”. I couldn’t understand why someone who claims to love, would speak to me at times with such utter contempt. I am grateful for your videos that help make me some sense of the crazy-making nonsense. It’s very, very difficult in the midst of it and trying to survive- like being in the fog of war.

Definitely they talk at you!! My husband thinks I should fulfill all his expectations, but criticize everything I do every day.

I love when Sam laughs it's hilarious 😂

This happened to me a week ago! A guy in a bar started talking to me. He had been staring at me for a while. He is a musician and talked about music for 15 minutes straight (a MONOLOGUE), then I told him that he was a "mine" of information and that I could listen to him for hours (I was IN AWE!!!). He told me that he could speak for hours. The interesting thing is that I was asking him questions at the beginning but, after a few minutes, I started to forget what I wanted to say. My mind went completely blank. Then he told me that he wanted to play with the other musicians in the bar and left. It was at that moment when I understood what had just happened. I felt confused at first and then stupid. He wanted SUPPLY and oh boy did he have it! Thank you Sam Vaknin for this channel. I'm learning, still making mistakes, but I'm getting faster at spotting the narcs' dynamics. This time it took me 20 minutes instead of 10 years! Not that bad!

Not everyone is in a position to ‘leave’ a narc.

My dad is a narcissist and its best to just keep things very basic, I know now why my great grandmother used to say, " least said, is best done", yep, good advise with a narcissist. My silence is deafening, because I am NOT a supply anymore.

Yes, dig deeper into the intent, what do they really want? Ignore the superficial mask/act they are giving you. Also pay attention to how they make you feel.

Before I knew what a narcissist was, in my early 20s I spent a LOT of time wondering why my mom never once called to ask how I was doing like I was aware normal mothers do 😂

I've noticed this since I was a kid I never could understand why they could never come out and say what they wanted what they needed or what they meant it always was a manipulated conversation with some other support system

I am legit shocked and I am only 30 seconds in. My entire life I have been saying that I am not nearly as interested in what people say or do as I am interested in why they say or do it, what was/is their motivation. Nobody has ever ag agreed with me or even said they understood why I felt that way. You have just made me feel so much more understood and normal. I often feel like I have a different way of thinking or looking at life than others. Truly thank you.

Spot on when it comes to my mother. I didn't think she had ever had a deep or intellectual conversation with anyone. And she makes things up to suit her about anything. I never had a real conversation her.