How to Make Them Call and Text You Every Day

"It's on you if you mistake my vulnerability for desperation" That's a mindset I want to keep in mind. 👍

"If your truest version of yourself is not right for someone, then they're not right for you".

That's how I treat all relationships. I'm proactive about taking the next step towards that potential friend/partner. But I do it with a more "experimental" mindset. So if they don't take a step forward, no big deal, I take that step backward (or end the connection). Casual friends stay casual. Distracted men lose my interest. I don't pay attention to what they say to me when we're together (or on social media). I observe their behavior: do they initiate a text conversation, do they invite me over/out, do they ask me about something I told them the last time we were together. If they're not making an effort, then I don't waste anytime on them.

I actually feel like I did the right thing. I asked a guy out for a second date last Monday. He said yes. And then Tuesday I asked if Saturday worked for him. Didn´t hear from him since then, so a friend of mine asked me out to go have drinks with her on Saturday, I waited until Friday to confirm and because he hadn't replied yet. I got annoyed and said yes to her. This guy appeared Friday night saying Saturday worked fine for him. And now I just told him I made other plans because he took 5 days to confirm. I still don't know what he will reply but even though I really like him I'm tired of being a doormat and waiting for guys to confirm a stupid date. I won't postpone other plans because of you.

As a 64 yo woman - I can guarantee Matthew is giving you all a BIG head start - I have wasted so many years being quiet, and waiting for the other person to lead. I recently reached out by making it very clear to a guy that I liked him - leaving the ball in his court. I have not heard from him again - but I am not left wondering "what if".

Always comes down to a very simple thing as well, and I find it never fails: if someone wants to be with you, they will do everything they can to be with you. You won't have any doubts.

People just need to chill and stop over analyzing relationships, especially early on. Bottom line is, if he's not paying attention to you, he's not into you. Invest time on yourself and the right person will come along...or not. Be happy on your own.

I modelled instead of mirroring after 5 dates. He wasn't capable of giving me anymore so I went forward and met a great guy who makes it easy to stay in touch. 😘

When you risk rejection You gain direction It's a form of protection So you don't get caught Being someone you're not

This just confirmed what I was feeling with a current potential relationship. I've been modeling the behavior I want to get back (asking about him, keeping conversations going, calling him, etc) but he doesn't give it back. I communicated my concerns but no changed behavior. Now I'm in the mirroring phase and he isn't hearing much from me, and he wonders why I don't reach out to him. He expresses interest, sends me a good morning text and makes an effort to spend time with me, but makes zero effort in asking me questions or wanting to get to know me. Now he just wants that instant gratification of just having someone there when he needs attention or is feeling lonely. What a waste of time...

'You are mistaking my vulnerability for desperation' love this part! Thank you!

I think people need to just relax and be themselves. Some people are more proactive and talkative than others. But if you feel like you’re chasing, doing all the work and it doesn’t feel good to you, then let them go, focus on your life and move on. 😊

That's a beautiful thought: 'When I am the best version of myself meaning act in a way that I am proud of myself, I don't have to fear someone elses reaction. Because I am at peace.' That thought itself gives me already peace.

I’m sorry, if a man is not actively pursuing me in the early dating stages after I’ve opened the door for him to do so, I will interpret that as him not being interested and move on to other men in my rotation.

It’s an art. If you’ve never done it successfully, I can understand how this might confuse some people. It doesn’t mean you will get the guy. It means you are what you want in a partner, if they don’t show you the same-you have your answer. Save yourself the time, fire em or just don’t give ‘em the position at all in the first place. The trick is also to be living your best life. If they are your only source of pleasure, you will get addicted just like a drug. You need to get a life first ☺️

I feel a little better now. Putting yourself out there and being rejected sucks, but in the long run, I'd rather not waste my time with someone with poor communication skills.

This was very helpful and affirms what I've been thinking lately: your partner has to treat you better than your platonic best friends. Your friends are that "minimum standard" of emotional relationship. Your friends would call you back or at least send a meme on another platform lol

It’s crazy how by working on myself and finding peace within being alone, facing my issues, having standards etc… I have found the best relationship I’ve ever been in. One that is stress free and « chase » free while still loving and fulfilling. We’re together but I’m still my own individual , and if it ended I would be incredibly sad but I I know I would get back on my feet. Over the years, your advice has truly helped me and opened my eyes to my relationship to myself and to others. Love these conversations 👌🏻

"It's on you if you mistake my vulnerability for desperation. And you'll quickly learn that you've miscalibrated here if you mistake my initial proactivity for desperation." I vibe with this. I feel confident being vulnerable with new people on dates, because I feel very secure in who I am. This is almost always a good thing, but I also don't hesitate to check out if the other party doesn't reciprocate.

“I showed just how wonderful I can be as a partner.” I love this. Thank you!